11.30.2011

guardian angel

My sweet granny is now an angel.

As I mentioned in an earlier post, my maternal grandmother has been fighting lung cancer for the last (almost) four years. She fought it as hard and as long as she could, but she lost her battle on Thanksgiving day, at two o'clock in the afternoon.  She went to meet Jesus the way she would have wanted to... at home, surrounded by her family, with her daughter and twin sister right by her side.  We are sad for us, but we are so happy for her.  She is no longer in pain, she is no longer broken, she is no longer scared or confused.  She is whole.

In late August, she went on hospice.  At that point, they were saying she would only be with us for a few more weeks... she showed them.  She got over a little hiccup and started doing  better.  By September, she was planning a little baby shower for our family.  She helped where she could, but was tired a lot of the time.  She had started to decline again at this point, but she held on for that baby shower.  She was so excited about our baby girl.  I'll never forget her face when we told her we were expecting, when we showed her that first ultrasound... pure joy.  After the baby shower, her health really took a turn for the worse.  She slept more, ate less, and we all knew it wouldn't be much longer.  Last weekend, she had to be catheterized, because she could no longer leave her bed.  On Monday, we were told she didn't have much time left.  Her 70th birthday was on Tuesday.  At that point, she was sleeping most of the day and not eating at all.

Thursday morning, I was woken up by a phone call.  My sister was on the other end; she was crying.  I knew immediately.  My mama didn't want to tell me, she was afraid for mine and baby girl's safety, but my sister knew I would want to be there.  Granny had taken a turn for a worse during the night, and they were saying she probably wouldn't make it through the day.  We got up and got ready, went and picked up my brother and sister (my parents didn't want them driving), and went to her house.  At that point, I still thought she was going to pull through.  She'd beaten every timeline, every time.... but when I saw her, I knew.  We got to her house at 1:50 pm, she passed away at 2:00 pm.  I know she was waiting on us to get there.

As selfish as it was, all I could think about was how she would never meet my baby girl.  When I tearfully admitted this to Ty, he told me that now our sweet girl has a gaurdian angel, and in my heart, I knew it was true.  Before they took her away, I got to tell her I loved her one last time, and I asked her to watch over our sweet girl... and I know she will.  One day, I will get to tell our girl about her beautiful gaurdian angel... how she never met her, but loved her so much.

2 comments:

  1. Ashley,
    I am so sorry to hear about your grandmother. My heart aches for you. But I'm thrilled to hear you are pregnant. Congratulations. Please keep in touch.
    Sarah :)
    Sarahnemmer@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete